Let’s Talk About Sex, Faeries, and Thunderbolts

Let me tell you about the wild, wicked world of "romantasy"

Oh darlings, let me tell you about the wild, wicked world of "romantasy" - the love child of fantasy and romance that's currently setting bookshelves and bedsheets ablaze. This genre is all about fornicating fairies, smoldering dragons, and enough sizzling sexual tension to melt your e-reader. 

In these tales, strapping male fairies pin down their sexual conquests with "hands like shackles" (consensually, of course). Forget about feminism - in the faerie realm, it's all about the rough-and-tumble tumbles. And don't even get me started on the spelling of "faerie" - it's enough to make a spelling bee safeword.

But who cares about a little linguistic tickle when the stories are this hot? Sarah J. Maas, the reigning queen of romantasy, has sold millions of books worldwide. That's a whole lot of horny people, and they're not just pimple-faced teenagers either. Bookstores are finally catching on, moving these steamy tomes from the back shelves to the front and center where they belong.

You see, fantasy has always had a naughty side, from the original bodice-ripping Grimm tales to the incestuous antics of Arthurian legend. Even prim Victorian novels were full of lusty longings and heaving bosoms. The 20th century may have tried to slap a chastity belt on the genre, but the sexual appetites of fantasy fans couldn't be suppressed forever.

Now, a whole generation of readers who grew up on "Harry Potter" and other tame young adult fare are all grown up and ready to swish their wands at something a bit more mature. These books, mostly written and devoured by women (huzzah!), deliver the magical goods and the erotic bads.

From dragon-riding military academies to the faerie courts, the settings are pure fantasy but the sex is all too real. Characters are too busy boning to be bothered with boring adulting like balancing their checkbooks or flossing. The dirty talk would make a Dungeons & Dragons dungeon master blush. When the sex is so good it conjures literal thunderbolts, who needs magic missiles?

People are loving romantasy and shelling out big bucks for the privilege. Publishing houses and streaming services are scrambling to exploit the trend, paying top dollar for the panty-dropping prose of writers like Sarah J. Maas and Rebecca Yarros. The money is rolling in faster than a sex-crazed satyr.

So to all the finger-waggers and tut-tutters out there, I say pish posh and pshaw! Let the people have their fairy fornication and dragon-boning. The world is on fire and we could all use a little escape, especially if that escape involves strapping warriors, wet-and-willing witches, and love that's harder to quit than fairy dust.

So my darlings, grab your favorite faerie tale, don your magical reading glasses, and join me in reveling in the ultimate walk of shame - getting caught reading romantasy in public. The only walk more delightful is the one those broad-chested fae brutes take after they've ravished you in a field of starflower fungus. Bliss!

Book suggestions:

Sarah J. Maas
She’s a powerhouse known for her richly woven narratives and complex characters. Her most famous works include the "Throne of Glass" series, where we follow the assassin Celaena Sardothien in a high-stakes competition to become the king's champion, only to unravel the kingdom's darkest secrets. The series is a thrilling blend of epic fantasy, intense character arcs, and swoon-worthy romance.

Then there’s the "A Court of Thorns and Roses" series, which starts off as a loose retelling of "Beauty and the Beast" and blossoms into a sprawling saga about Feyre Archeron, a mortal turned fae who navigates through ancient curses, political intrigue, and wars. The emotional depth and the electric chemistry between the characters make it a fan favorite.

Rebecca Yarros
She dives into both romantasy and contemporary romance with a gripping, emotional punch. She’s known for her "Flight & Glory" series, which features military themes woven with deeply emotional narratives about sacrifice, duty, and love. Her books often explore the challenges and triumphs of military life, making the romance all the more poignant and heartfelt.

Her entry into the fantasy romance genre with books like "The Last Legacy" adds another layer to her repertoire. This novel combines the intrigue of magical legacies with the raw emotional draw of her signature writing style, creating another thrilling narrative.

But wait! There’s more! 

Cassandra Clare
Her “Shadowhunter Chronicles” thrust you into a world where angelic warriors and demonic foes blur the lines between good, evil, and downright sexy. Start with “City of Bones” and prepare to be enchanted.

Laini Taylor
Her “Daughter of Smoke and Bone” trilogy—where wishes are currency and the currency is as crimson as the star-crossed love it buys. Her prose? As lush as a velvet dream.

Jennifer L. Armentrout 
Stoking the embers with her “Blood and Ash” series. Prepare yourself for a world where every whisper of danger is matched by a moan of delight.

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Romantasy is here to stay, and it's deliciously divine. Let the pages turn, the hearts yearn, and the faerie lights burn!